Are You Ready to Try a Different Path?

2021. This is the year. 2020 was a wash. But this year will be different. This is the year that I’m going to…          

Deal with my anger issues
Lose weight
Get a promotion
Find the perfect romantic partner
Feel better about myself
Figure out who I am
Drink less
Find something to help me feel less lost and untethered

I’m going to crack the code. I’m going to find THE thing that will fix things and all the other things, that will fix me. Maybe I can read a new book or go back to one I’ve read before. Maybe I’ll sign up for a class, try that new app, check out that workshop that I heard about.

Does any of this sound familiar? You know something isn’t quite right, but you aren’t sure what to do about it. By all counts you feel like you should be doing well and enjoying life, but instead you find that: 

You’re successful, but you never feel like you measure up
You have unexplained anxiety and/or depression
You don’t really like yourself if you’re being honest

Maybe it seems outwardly that all is well, and you even tell yourself that it is, but you never slow down long enough or allow for enough quiet to pay attention to the underlying current of unease that’s always, always there. And you work really hard to not let yourself know about it.

But then something gets your attention. You max out one more credit card, yell at your kids in a way that scares them and you, your anxiety starts to feel unbearable, you have unexplainable health issues, or you get laid off. Or maybe one day you’ve just had enough of living the way that you’re living. You’re tired. And you don’t know what to do next.

You may not like what I’m about to say, but: that unsettledness you feel is a good place to be. It’s good because it means that you might be open to seeking a new type of help. 

Perhaps the things that you’ve tried before haven’t worked, and you’re ready to try something different. There’s nothing wrong with the books, workshops, and apps—they’ve likely been helpful—but you find that you still struggle with the things that led you to those resources.

Here’s the thing…I don’t have a magic answer that will solve all of your problems. To be honest, I’m glad there’s not an answer that magically heals our emotional pain.

Full disclosure, I haven’t always felt this way. When I first was in therapy and dealing with my stuff, I wanted to know the fastest and easiest path. However, as I continued on my healing journey, my True Self Journey, I realized that an important part of the healing came from experiencing the process. If there had been a magic answer, I would’ve missed out on the richness and lessons that come from the journey itself.

One of the ways that journey starts is by being honest about what’s going on in your inner world—about what is and isn’t working in your life, about how you view yourself, about the things you do to numb or avoid your feelings.

Getting honest about this isn’t easy and doesn’t happen all at once—nor should it. Bringing awareness to what’s in your heart, mind, and soul that you’ve spent so much time avoiding is an incremental process. Trust that you’ll know what you’re ready to know, when you’re ready to know it. Just be available. Start by letting yourself see what you’re struggling with, and ask yourself if you’re open to trying something different this time.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be discussing next steps on Instagram, Facebook, and the blog. But before we go there, try to sit with the thoughts and feelings that are surfacing. Simply by not moving too quickly to find an answer or solution, you’re already heading down a new path. You’re starting down the path of your True Self Journey.

Peace on the Journey,